Thing have been going pretty good here lately. We got Lukes' vest and swing in. He isnt too crazy about the SPIO but he sure does love his swing. Meltdowns have been minimal, he has been much happier and smiling so big it lights up the room. Past few nights have been hard, he is waking up screaming again and we have no clue what is wrong. Nothing I do can soothe him, I cant touch him or talk to him. Everything makes it much worse. Worst part about his Autism so far is the inability to communicate with us. It has to be so frustrating and sad to not be able to talk. We always get past the storms though, there will be many bumps in the road and there is always coffee!
This past Sunday we went to an aquarium, Luke loves water and fish so much. It is very relaxing for him. We did have a very nice time but one comment almost ruined it all for me. I know there are many more like this, and looks like this to come but it was my first. It took me by suprise and at first I was upset but I didnt want to let it ruin my experience. See on Saturdays and Sundays the aquarium only allowes strollers from 3p.m to close (I assume its due to them being busier), but it also clearly states that Special Needs Strollers are always welcome. Now I know my son doesnt "look" Autistic, who does? Its not a disease. So we go at open, 10 a.m. and the first lady smiles at me and says nothing about the stroller. We get to the next area right before you buy the tickets and the young lady says "We have a rule about strollers on Saturday and Sundays. They are only permitted after 3 p.m.".
Me-"Yes I know but your website clearly says that you allow special needs strollers at any time".
Her-"Well yea for actual special needs". (Que the eye rolling and gives me a look like I am an idiot)
Now here is my logic, if I brought up the fact that I looked into it and brought up that special needs strollers are welcome and I bring my son in a small stroller, then why are you, the lady who deals with the public going to roll your eyes at me and act like I am a moron. Like I said I know my son doesn't "look" Autistic or special needs, I didn't know they had a special look. I calmly said to her, "He is Autistic, I need him in the stroller". She immediately said sorry, a few times. I told her it was fine but for his safety and anxiety, I need him to be in the stroller. She again says sorry.
Let me say this, I am not mad at her. Its not her fault and once again, Autism doesn't have a "look". It was just the shock of her rolling her eyes at me and looking at him like, there isn't a damn thing wrong with him and I am a moron. This is very mild compared to some of the things I have read from other mothers about looks and comments. I know I got off easy but I guess it finally hit home in a way for me. Once I got home I quickly looked up my go to gal pal who has a son on the spectrum and vented to her. I like to talk to people who really get me and know where I come from and have experienced it first hand because it makes me feel so much better. She gave me some great advice, to get a medical bracelet for him and to call ahead to places and tell them we are coming and the situation with Luke. I would have never thought of that and its brilliant. I haven't had a lot of experience in dealing with all this yet and she has the best advice always. I would be truly lost without her.
So please all my readers, do me one favor. When you think a child is spoiled in the store or having a fit or they look different or act different, don't judge. Please just smile and carry on. Understanding and acceptance means the world to us. We all need to feel loved and accepted any where we go. We often feel left out and talked about and it hurts. I hope in meeting me, the lady will not be so quick to roll her eyes or hopefully take a different approach to someone who is bringing in a stroller. Education is our best tool. Its what I must do for him, so when he grows up things will be different and easier.
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